Saturday, July 17, 2010

It's Scary Out There.

Graduating from high school was one of the best days of my life. But since that time, the high has worn off and reality has set in. I think I just expected life to be so great once I had freedom, but with freedom comes more responsibility. Right after finals, I went straight back to work; there really was no down time in between. June 10th rolled around, and I was off to Europe for two weeks on a school tour with the same people I'd just spend an entire school year with. Now I had to live with them . . . for two whole weeks. It honestly felt more like three months. The trip was fun, and I'm glad I got the chance to go to Europe, but I wish it would have been more of a vacation and cultural experience. I'm in the middle of sorting through all 1200 pictures.

I recovered from jet lag not at home in bed, but at work. Coffee has become my new best friend. Once back in the states, it dawned on me that I probably needed to get my college affairs in order. How the heck am I going to pay my way through college after a $4000 trip? My bank account is totally drained. I enrolled at a technical college. All I basically had to do was say, "Hi, my name is...." and I was accepted . . . only to find out that I was two months late in the registration process. Just my luck. The only three classes left were the Fundamentals of Massage 1, 2, 3. I signed up not really know what else to do, but I know I can't take those classes at the same time. I also can't wait a quarter and then begin the program in the winter.

I sat down with the parental figures to talk about church, setting up a budget, and dating. I want to start a budget, so I know how to handle money and prioritize what my money gets spent on. You can never learn how to do that soon enough. They mentioned that if I needed to, I could take a year off and just work. Immediately the pieces fell together. Why don't I just do that? So that's what I'm doing: I am taking a year off. It kinda gives me peace of mind, but it's weird to think that I won't be going to school when everyone else I know will be.

I just want a pause button right now to figure out how I got here. Where did my life go? I should have taken more time to enjoy my teenage years because I'm almost wishing I had them back.