Thursday, August 28, 2008


This is something I've been struggling with since summer began. Are some people meant to be alone? To feel detached from everyone and everything? I hate that feeling, but should I really start accepting it? I just want to belong somewhere...anywhere. Yet the more I try to find that place, the more I drift away. I just want someone to come find me, and tell me I'm not alone. The harsh reality is that I've never fit in. I'm the different one: Different at school, at home, with friends. This begs the question: What's wrong with me? I'm not going to lie, but I do like being alone sometimes, and it's all most preferable in my house. So have I done this to myself? I'm literally coasting through life; Not in a surreal sense, but in a horrible nightmarish kind of way. Am I the only one who feels this way?
I can't really explain this right, so you might be in for another post like this sometime down the road.


Skippy said...

Fitting in for me, has always been overrated. I rather be comfortable with myself, and love myself, before I expect others to like me. Maybe you shouldn't try so hard fitting in, but focus more on just being you.

Lonely Heart said...

You bring up a very good point. Although, I have to be honest, I have trouble loving myself. But the more I try just being me, everyone else seems to have a problem with it = /.

Skippy said...

Trying to block out what other people say and think is difficult. But having that feeling of not caring about what anyone else say, is so liberating. And much more stress free.

Perhaps, you just haven't found the right group of people yet. Who accept you for you, and nothing else.

Red said...

I am not a mold fitter. For example, I am a homeschooling athiest mom in a majorily Christian community. Wouldn't that be a great dinner conversation.

Anyhow, let me start by saying that being alone is differnt than being lonely. When my family leaves me alone, if only for an hour, I happily wave good-bye. Why? Becuase I enjoy the solitude...I drink it in. So when they return, I am glad they are home.

And yet, when it is dinner time I want everyone around me, I want tons of poeple with me at meals and holidays, but once it is over...Bye bye...see ya...TTFN. Are you following me?

In being alone you have time to find yourself and look inside. You may not like what you see, but you know what, you are thee only one who can make changes, that is if you want changes.

I like who I am, always have, always will. I can be loud and take over a room, so I have to be careful not to tick any one off, but that does not always work. If you don't like my personality, then don't invite yourself over to my home and we will be good.

You, and no one else holds your destiny in your hands. Yeah, others can help mold and guide you, but in thee end, you are the one who makes choices...not them.

Realx, take a deep breath and do what is right for you...not them!!

Lonely Heart said...

Wow I wish someone would have told me that awhile ago. I'm getting what you're saying about the difference between being alone and being lonely.

I'll work on relaxing.

Thank you.