Hmmm I'm getting really good at losing friends. Who would've thunk it? Of course right now I'm not exactly sure, but I'm pretty positive that I'm going to be saying good bye to yet another friendship. So much for all the time and effort I put into it. So much for getting close to someone again. So much for trying to be there no matter what. Another failed attempt, and another person I will never be able to move on from. By now you probably want me to get on with things and just tell you what's going on.
Things between me and K. have been somewhat strained recently. I don't really understand what happened or if anything actually happened. Maybe it's just one of those "we're growing a part" kind of things. It's been really rocky all of last week, and this weekend was the straw that broke the camel's back (well my back really).
He went to this thing called Disciple Now at his church. And I guess something really moved him. Last night I received this text from him telling me that he had changed. He said he wouldn't swear and do other things I wont mention ever again. My reaction was very mixed. On the one hand, I was really happy for him, but at the same time I was think "Good luck with that: You'll need it." Another thought that occurred simultaneously was "He's not going to be all that fun to talk to anymore." His new found change meant that I would have to change the way I am when I talk to him if that makes sense. Well I didn't text him back...
And there has been no communication since. I feel bad about the whole thing really. I just kind of don't know what to do cause I feel like we're not on the same page anymore.
7 comments:
well, i dont really know what to say...
i guess, u should act just the same way u were acting with him but just...be more...umm...u know, how he is now. I know thats probably not so possible.
the same thing is happening with me, but the opposite. He became sorta more...mean. he likes to make jokes bout other people...he says dumb, mean stuff without meaning it...and is sooooooo friggen full of himself!!! ugh!! "I'm Beastin, my enemies are intimidated by me!" my Gosh...
but i decided, he's my friend anyway...even though he's changed, and he's becoming someone different, and I'm just same old me...we still had great times together no matter what...so i think, I'll endure it, and just act the same, just a BIT different. maybe he'll grow out of it. but we're all trying to figure out who we are, maybe he's still not sure, and i need to let him find out. U should be happy for K. He's just been inspired and he's trying to be the best person he can be. i understand its not so simple, but, support him, and have fun with him in just a bit of a different way. he's always still the same person inside. U guys don't have to grow apart, sure, it will be sorta wierd at first, but u guys are friends anyway.
I know its not that simple, and maybe it wont work out. But try. Trust me, a big part of my life was ruined cuz someone important didnt try hard enough. I still have'nt forgiven him. He ruined my whole family...
I hope things get better.
xoxo
it's always hard when things like that happen. I know how that must feel except I'm on K's side. I'm Mormon and sometimes I believe the church and love it. But there are other times when I am filled with this awful doubt. It's hard to change who I am, especially when I act differently around everyone of my friends. (But who doesnt) I hope that you and K will still be able to figure things out and be friends even though your spiritual are religious views are not the same.
I like your blog :).
Ah, religion can have a tendency to tear people apart. It happened to a friend of mine, with her former best friend. It doesn't necessarily have to happen with you though, as long as you keep talking with your friend. If he cares about your friendship, and is willing to do everything he can to save it, you should be fine. He might change a little, obviously, but you should still be able to connect as friends, like you always have. I'd just make sure he knows you support him, but don't want to lose him to his new found 'faith' :P. Sometimes it's just a phase with people anyways. Good luck with it all.
I hate it when people grow apart.
Like, one of my best friends for the past two years and I really don't talk that much anymore. It's almost like it happened all at once.
I just started reading your blog and I love it! You have some really good stories, and some great things are said. Maybe you and K will be able to work things out and still be friends despite the changes he's going through.
yeah that makes sense, I hope it's not too late, but im sure he'll understand. You two seems like close friends, especially if he was willing to confide in you with his new insight. I'm sure he'll be willing to sort everything out :)
depressing. but i know how you feel.
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